


Moonlight

by rpgslut



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst and Feels, Blood and Injury, Character Death, Flashbacks, M/M, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Sylvix Week (Fire Emblem), Sylvix Week 2020 (Fire Emblem), Till Death Do Us Part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:50:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26710153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rpgslut/pseuds/rpgslut
Summary: SylvixWeek2020 Day 8: Free Day“Hey Felix? Remember when we were kids and we made a promise about dying together…? "
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	Moonlight

**Author's Note:**

> The song I listened on repeat while writing this was "Claire de Lune" and I highly recommend you listen to it while reading. I think it will really help with the mood I'm trying to convey.

“Heh…” Sylvain laughed emptily, lying motionless on his back. Frost puffed out of his mouth with each deep breath he took, trying to keep his breathing steady. “How unlucky...I should’ve known it was going to be like this though...” Sylvain weakly placed a hand on his torn abdomen, poorly attempting to slow the bleeding. All it took was a sword to his side to bring him moments away from his end; an instance that only took seconds. Why did he even bother to think he would make it out of a battle unscathed this time, especially after all of the previous attempts to end his own life? But at the same time, why did he have to meet his end here? Why now? For a fraction of a moment, he didn’t want it to be over, not with Felix finally at his side. He finally found something that made him want to hold onto life for just a while longer. He just wanted to end the war and spend the remainder of his life with Felix. Maybe adopt some kids, even a cat too, just to live out the rest of their days together.

Sylvain smiled at the thought of it. Actually, he would have busted out laughing if it weren’t for the blood rushing out of him into the soil below. Who would have thought? In the past, Sylvain couldn’t even see himself, let alone imagine, being in a happy household filled with love and warmth, especially not with someone who legitimately loved him. “What a joke...The Goddess must really be getting a kick out of this,” he chuckled and let out a sigh. His gaze fell onto the night sky; it was beautifully clear, allowing the large, round moon to shine gently upon him. On nights like these, Sylvain reminisced. He and Felix would often take walks together throughout the monastery, sometimes hand in hand while everyone else slept or were preoccupied with other nightly things. They talked about anything: the whetstone Felix bought that day to help sharpen his sword, how good the fish sauté was, ordinary, mundane things. After some moments of being intoxicated by moonlight, Felix would open up his heart to Sylvain: his desires, his aspirations, his fears all placed delicately before Sylvain to grasp gently into his own hands. Sylvain held all of those things close to his heart. 

As moments of earnestness would pass, lighthearted banters and sweet kisses would be exchanged under the pale moonlight. He could clearly hear Felix’s voice saying, “are you an idiot,” after one of his tasteless jokes, he could remember the feeling of Felix’s fingers running through his messy hair as they laid down together in the dew covered grass, the smell of sweet lavender rising from Felix’s hair. Lavender...Sylvain was brought back to the time of frantically pacing back and forth in his dorm, thinking about what to get Felix for his birthday. Mercedes jokingly gave him the idea of making a potion for Felix, something that would calm his nerves and sharp tongue. Although it was a joke, Sylvain loved the idea; something custom for Felix to help him relax, even if it was just a little. He spent countless nights in the library studying different plants and herbs to make a perfume for Felix. After numerous attempts and days worth of research, he was finally able to make a small batch of lavender perfume. He remembered Felix’s exact words when he gave it to him, “If you think I smell, you could’ve just said so. There was no need to be a passive aggressive asshole about it.”

Sylvain never laughed so hard in his entire life. Felix’s cheeks were burning red with embarrassment while his eyes looked like they wanted to drive a hundred daggers into Sylvain. He explained why he made it and the blank look of realization on Felix’s face was priceless. Felix didn’t speak to Sylvain for the rest of the day, but he could tell that Felix really appreciated the gift, and that in itself was all Sylvain needed. 

Sylvain remembered the very first time Felix wore the perfume; it was the night of the ball. After mingling with his fellow students, he decided to look for Felix. Sylvain found him behind the Goddess Tower sitting on the ground, head turned up towards the night sky. A light breeze picked up blowing all sorts of aromas into Sylvain’s face: pine, rain, grass, and lavender. For the rest of that night, they laid on the ground, Felix pressed against his chest, and watched the stars.

The memories of delicate touches and tight embraces took the place of darker thoughts in Sylvain’s mind, he no longer felt the pain of the lethal blow at his stomach, he just wanted to see Felix. Sylvain desperately missed him and was ready to torment himself for retiring early. “Fuck…” Sylvain let out as pressure began to build in his throat. “Felix,” he choked, “I want to see you... just one last time.”

Sylvain loved Felix with every fiber of his being. He didn’t think he could ever love or be loved, but being with Felix undid all of those past torments. No...that wasn't. Sylvain undid it himself, he was always capable of doing that, but spending so much time in darkness, he no longer saw it as a possibility. Felix gave him the light to see that he was much more deserving. Felix cloaked him in love with everything he did: brushing the hair from Sylvain’s forehead after training, putting a blanket over him when he fell asleep in the library, getting him his favorite food when he was ill. Felix gave him nothing but tenderness, something both of them were so unfamiliar with at some point in their troubled lives. He gave Sylvain the sun...no. That wasn’t quite right. Felix wasn’t the sun. His feelings weren’t that bright and intense. It was something else...The distant luster of the stars that blanketed the sky felt familiar, but that wasn’t it either. Not a star… Sylvain ruminated. Felix wasn’t that distant. It was something closer, more familiar, yet easy to overlook…

“Finally...I found you..” a familiar voice panted. Through the audible exhaustion, there was happiness in the voice. Sylvain’s eyes began to fill up with tears. He didn’t notice the sound of the footsteps approaching due to his incapacitation, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered, but the fact that he was able to hear that voice once more. 

“Felix…” Sylvain said in almost a whisper. “I wish I could see you, but it’s getting kinda hard to turn my head and it's just a tad bit dark.” a laugh made it past his lips.

“It is night time...you fool,” Felix chuckled. It seems that one line took the last batch of energy he had left. He collapsed to the ground and let out a faint grunt. “It took me a while, but...I made it in time to...keep our promise.” Felix began to crawl towards Sylvain, slowly and steadily.

“Stop,” Sylvain said sternly. He heard the sound of Felix’s armor dragging in the mud and immediately knew what he was doing. “Save your strength. I’m a goner, but you can make it if you save your strength. Someone could come and-”

“No one is coming.” Felix’s words were sharp. “Everyone is dead. It’s...just us.” his voice grew quiet, almost as if he were shrinking in stature. “We..lost. It’s only a matter of time before the empire burns this whole place down.” The end result of the battle didn’t even cross his mind. Everyone died, and he and his beloved were not long from sharing the same fate as his allies, but for some reason, this was not painful nor sad. Felix was now by his side and he wasn’t alone anymore.

Felix finally made it up to Sylvain and gently draped his arm around his torso, nestling himself into Sylvain’s sprawled open arms. Sylvain slowly inhaled and remembered that smell...Lavender…

“You don't have to worry about turning your head anymore, we can just stay like this for a while. It’s only a matter of time until the miasma course through my whole body.” Sylvain did without Felix’s suggestion and turned his head anyways. With some squinting, Sylvain recognized the features he loved so much: the sharpness of Felix’s eyes, the soft bow of his lips, the porcelain skin glowing like the moon... Yes...That was it.

“The moon..” Sylvain admired. Felix was the moon, softening the dark loneliness he encapsulated himself in for all of those years. Being in the dark wasn’t scary if he could see, and Felix gave him that clarity. How did it take him so long to realize? Felix's subtle glow was the beacon that brought him out of darkness. 

“Oh yeah,” Felix smiled. “There’s a full moon tonight.” Felix laid on his side, never breaking his gaze from Sylvain. “We spent a lot of time on nights like these back at the monastery,” Felix slowly placed his hand on top of Sylvain’s bloodied hand, unable to grip it. “Five years and here we are...dying like some idiots...unbelievable.” Felix scoffed.

“Quite a shame. I will never get to see you with your hair curled. Annette promised me she would get you to do it again” Sylvain smirked. He loved teasing Felix, he always knew what to say to get under his skin, even if it was just a little bit.

“Piss off. If we weren’t dying now, I would kill you personally.” Felix laughed softly, bouncing slightly in between Sylvain’s arm; such a warm feeling. “This may be the last time we could do this.” Sylvain met his eyes with Felix’s and smiled fondly. “You know,” Felix squinted his eyes. “That look used to piss me off.”

“‘Used to’? So that means it doesn’t anymore? I wonder what could have changed.” Sylvain chuckled.

“I realized that...I love you, you damned idiot.” Felix’s cheeks reddened slightly. Sylvain loved seeing Felix get flustered over romance; that’s how he really knew Felix meant every word of affection he said, unlike himself. The words ‘I love you’ would roll off of his tongue so easily when he was younger. Countless people would emptily use those words against him to get in his good graces. At once point, Sylvain hated that phrase; it held no actual meaning. Anything and anyone could be loved, but for some reason, those words coming out of Felix’s mouth felt like velvet to his ears. It felt as true as the blue in the sky. Sylvain couldn’t help but smile fondly at Felix. “What? No witty rebuttal this time?”

“Nope. Not a single one.” Sylvain laughed. He already lost feeling in his legs and feeling in his arm was quickly vanishing. “I’m just...really lucky.”

“Sylvain, you are literally dying. I’m not sure how many would consider being on your last breath ‘lucky’,” Felix snickered.

“When you put it like that, I could’ve been dealt another hand,” Sylvain laughed. “But...I’m not alone. My biggest fear was dying alone. That’s lucky to me. I always tried so desperately to surround myself with people, but then I would quickly sabotage the relationships when I realized what I’m using them for: just so I wasn’t alone. The reason was the same with each person. It was pretty bad.”

“Did you ever think you were using me?”

“Yes,” Sylvain answered honestly. “That scared me at first, but then I realized that only you saw me for who I truly was. I wanted to be with you because you accepted me for who I was and still am: a good-for-nothing flirt.”

“Damn right, I’ve known you for too long,” Felix smiled. “You know, no matter how hard I tried to push you away, you never left me. You always…” his words trailed off.

“Fe..? Hey, Fe?” Sylvain was inflicted with panic. He lifted his bloody hand from under Felix’s and placed it on top, gently shaking with all of his might. “Are you still with me?” he already felt tears begin to obscure his blackened vision.

“Y-yeah. I’m not sure for much longer, but I’m here.” Felix said with hooded eyes. The life that were in his cheeks began to fade. His cracked lips opened to speak, “you always were there...when I needed you the most..even now. Thank you, Sylvain.”

“I could say the same thing,” Sylvain choked. “Felix Hugo Fraldarius, I love you so much.”

“Sylvain, I love you. I can’t even muster the strength to kiss you one last time...” a tear rolled across Felix’s face. 

“Yeah, but this is enough.” Sylvain smiled warmly. “I’m glad we could both keep our promise.” Sylvain gazed at Felix. Felix smiled one last time before his eyes slowly began to close. Sylvain had lost all feeling in his body. If he didn’t initially feel Felix lay into him, he wouldn’t have been able to tell if someone was there or not. His eyes grew heavy and his heart beat slowed. It was time. “Goodbye, my love.” Sylvain whispered as he allied his eyes to shut. As they both laid on the ground with their bodies intertwined, the moonlight blanketed their still bodies for their eternal slumber.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so so much for reading. This is the first fic I published in a LONG time and the first time posting on ao3. If you have any suggestions for tagging, I'm all ears! I want to write more, so hopefully I am more consistent. I've had this idea for a LONG time and I'm so glad I finally shared it.


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